Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Just high enough for therapy.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
