i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
