i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I blacked out after you got about 8 goldfish out of the tank and put them in your pockets. We're not allowed back. It was a sucky Walmart anyway...
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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