Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
I asked her why she was drunkenly masturbating to Iron Man and all she replied was "Robert Downey Jr". As far as excuses go, that seemed pretty legit.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Randomize
