i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Today might be the day that I legitimately throw up in my saxophone.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
How is your new roommate working out
We are drinking at the laundromat. And will probably have sex later. So...pretty good.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
Randomize
