yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
