these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
im at a loss of words.... a stripper is dancing to a Justin Bieber song.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
