I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
My grandpa is giving me detailed instructions on how to fight a second floor bedroom fire from a ladder on the out side. Just in case
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize
