looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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