i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
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