So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
Well someone named our apartment "the eiffel tower" on facebook check-in so I think they know..
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
