we're chasing vodka with high fives
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
You know I love you more than life itself, but love has its limits. And so help me god, if you bail on me, I will fucking watch the last Game of Thrones episode without you.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
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