I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
I'm covered in glow paint and I can't find my shirt. So, successful night
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Straight up just cock blocked my dad. Also this apple sauce is good.
Randomize
