Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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