it hurts more in the daytime
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He screamed "Hug me!" and dove into the bushes. How he gets laid every weekend is beyond me.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Sorry I sent you a video of a singing reverend last night, I was really high.
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize
