you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Then, even the devil himself would be scared of us. And we'd be bestfriends with Jesus. He would love us.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Randomize
