Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
