just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I just saw two girls throwing up in the bathroom. they were high-fiving under the stall...
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
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