If i come over, it means nothing
Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
