If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
It was like what a highfive between zeus and Jesus would sound like
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
The car just stinks of weed and we are all sitting here trying to hide it from my mom by rolling down the windows, like it's not coming off my sisters boyfriend
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
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