Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
It felt like I was on painkillers mixed with Molly mixed with the sinking feeling I'll die alone. 10/10 doing again.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
