end the night at a gay bar...not sure how...but why the fuck do i have two condoms in my pocket?
as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
awesome recipe for disaster- bar hopping at the airport
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Randomize
