i soberly give you permission to do that to me when im drunk
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Randomize
