i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is
My mom just said we needed to put weed into our earthquake kit.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I'm drunk off vodka and I haven't eaten today. I've never felt more like Kirsten Cohen in my life.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
Randomize
