North Korea, Best Korea!
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
