my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
the 3rd commandment: and god said, if you buy a handle.. you must finish it.
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
just told my mom that i'm having a bad day and she responded with "maybe you should pour yourself a nice drink". good to know that my parents support my future of alcoholism
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
Hey babe! Random question. Do you by chance have the pic of my nipples covered with ninja turtles band aids? Thanks.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
