yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
Randomize