you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
Randomize
