I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
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