the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Randomize
