I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Apparently I still called the officer "sir" despite the fact I was at a .21 BAC. Southern girls are raised right
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
You can cuddle me. Word on the street is my ass is ridiculous.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
Randomize
