The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I might come over. Something about you makes me matronly and I have this urge to nurse you back to health with soup and a blowjob
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You were stoned out of your mind. We were eating cold cuts and you wouldn't shut up about how it was the wettest meat you'd ever felt in your life.
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
