dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Randomize
