i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Ten minute nap on a staircase honey badger don't care
I love you. Mom got to wasted at the wedding that she threw up on my shirt.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I sexted him with a GIF from titanic and it worked....
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
