the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
you almost dropped the shot glass then you thought you were such a hard ass for catching it that you slammed it on the table and broke it
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
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