I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm 10 cats away from completing my post divorce transformation.
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
Randomize
