I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
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