Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize