Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
i haven't been laid since the bush administration. it's frustrating.
Some advice for success: 1) Go ugly early, it saves you time and money; 2) If you can't pork a princess, pound a pig for practice; and 3) Beauty is only a light switch away.
ur like the dr phil of bizarro world.
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
