I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
