brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
im like that movie w. ryan reynolds, no ones ever going to date me unless they're forced to marry me.
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
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