I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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