brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
I even tried crushing up viagra and putting it in his beer... And the next day he found the package on the counter. I told him it was for my friends husband.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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