More tranny stories later!
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Decided I'm going to wear a shirt that says "I'm sorry" whenever we go back to that fraternity
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize