Nope, didn't see her. We left when you told us you were going to make the " big beef burrito supreme" even more supreme and you took your dick out.
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
