do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
If someone made a breakfast cereal that was a cross between lucky charms and fruity pebbles and called it unicorn power with a huge fucking rainbow and a unicorn standing in a pot of gold on the box, they would be rich. Not only monetarily but spiritually as well...
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Randomize
