his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
everytime he speaks i want to fuck him less. i just wanna tell him to shut up and take his pants off and we could both be happy.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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