But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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