I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
