Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(609): View more from New Jersey

i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem

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(720): View more from Colorado

I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.

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(845): View more from New York

im poppin the ladies like they're bacne

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(520): View more from Arizona

chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended

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(705): View more from Ontario

and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.

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(802): View more from Vermont

I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"

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(810): View more from Michigan

so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night

(1-810): View more from Michigan

About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'

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